Written on 9/10/21
Discernment, I am a lover that loves to love love so naturally my egg sees the romance. Read Genesis chapter 1 before reading on and pray the prayer: Lord, give me discernment of my heart, show me what you want me to see, and grant me wisdom and understanding. Here is what I believe to be the first ever love story told. Okay, so it begins a little something like this, Genesis 1:1-2:
1 “In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth.”
Immediately, I see that God split one thing into two: time split into heaven and earth. Two places, metaphysical and physical, here and now, up and down.
2 “Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters.”
The earth was Formless: lacking order, shapeless, no material existence. And Empty: holding nothing, containing nothing, no elements, no members, null. No occupants, zero habitants, vacant, lacking force of power, not put to use, idle, needing nourishment, hungry, to transfer or pour off completely, to unburden, relieve, to discharge its contents… to become empty.
Empty. I went further into the definition of this next word not knowing the depths of ‘Null’: having no legal force, invalid, of no consequence, amounting to nothing, absent, non-existent, zero magnitude.
That sounds super lonely.
See in verse 2 it also mentions the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters. This is the most beautiful and intimate moment that Elohim is sharing with us. If we don’t slow down, we’ll miss it. That word there after formless, after empty, after darkness, after deep… Hovering means he was floating, fluttering in the air, to linger there. Can anyone place themselves in a moment of “fluttering”? Maybe experiencing butterflies?
I believe we're seeing YHWH’s heart as he’s growing from infancy to maturity – like adolescence. I don’t know about you, but when I hit puberty, I loved to love and love and I just loved all of everything. I squeezed the cat til its eyes bulged, I painted my body with love poems, and I would just tell kids I hardly knew, “I love you”. Not even kidding.
I looked up the Hebrew word used here and its “mə·ra·ḥe·p̄eṯ” which means an ‘occurrence’. So not only is he falling in love, he’s making it in that moment. Love began. Let’s go to the Greek, the word is “φτερούγισμα” which translates to the ethereal: extremely delicate and light in a way that seems too perfect for this world.
How beautiful is that definition!? I’m elated with joy having just discovered it!! Our God crushin’ some water. I wondered who the water was, like if she had a name or why he felt the need to get after her. I’ve been slowly digesting Proverbs with this baby walk of mine and I believe I found her: Lady Wisdom. Proverbs 7:4 says we’re to call her our Sister and to call understanding our relative. Where do our relatives go when they pass? Proverbs 3:19-20 says,
“19 The Lord founded the earth by wisdom and established the heavens by understanding. 20 By his knowledge the watery depths broke open, and the clouds dripped with dew.”
That’s what she said, am I right?! Come on, this is totally his moment! Give him an air five. Proverbs 3:13-18 I believe this is his love letter about her. Funny, the ages of puberty!
13 Happy is a man who finds wisdom and who acquires understanding, 14 for she is more profitable than silver, and her revenue is better than gold. 15 She is more precious than jewels; nothing you desire can equal her. 16 Long life is in her right hand; in her left, riches and honor. 17 Her ways are pleasant, and all her paths, peaceful. 18 She is a tree of life to those who embrace her, and those who hold on to her are happy.
Can we say, “happy wife, happy life”? Like any gentleman, YHWH was discreet.
3 Then God said, “Let there be light,” and there was light.
Photo Taken 11/03/15 @ 5:38pm in Baja California Sur
Now the light is on, light bulb, by his knowledge. Now, he goes a step further and separates his light from his darkness. The split happened again like Metamorphosis: a magical transformation; when he separated the light from the darkness, day from night. God started in his darkness before he fell in love with wisdom. Love is the light in the darkness.
Darkness: Lacking Brightness. Formless and Empty. Not evil, I don’t see evil as of yet so it’s just literally dark, like the light is just off.
4 God saw that the light was good, and God separated the light from the darkness. 5 God called the light “day,” and the darkness he called “night.” There was an evening, and there was a morning: one day.”
Now this next verse in Genesis holds a special place for me. When I was a kid I had dreams, oh boy, did I have dreams. Dreams don’t have to be scary if you know how to interpret them. Unfortunately, by way of the world, my dreams we’re dusted off as nightmares and presumably my fault. I realized I was doing the same thing to my nephew, “What did you watch to have that thought?! Because of my dreams I became the literal wedge between my parents until I was about eleven. My comfort zone, my safe place, hold me, and scratch my arm until I fall asleep.
6 Then God said, “Let there be an expanse between the waters, separating water from water.” 7 So God made the expanse and separated the water under the expanse from the water above the expanse. And it was so. 8 God called the expanse “sky.” Evening came and then morning: the second day.
Guys, we are literally wedged between the spirits of the Lord. The LORD God made us with his LOVE for wisdom and knowledge is what brings us closer to our Lord. So while he watches over us in the heavens, we are comforted by our nature - 75% of the human body is water. The Lord crushin some water. On November 2nd, I read in Job 11:6 that true wisdom has two sides. Does your wife have two sides? Two sides to every story? Perspective. The second part of wisdom had me circling the seven spirits in Isaiah 11:2 to fully grasp our creation story. Here’s the verse:
The Spirit of the Lord will rest on him—
a Spirit of wisdom and understanding,
a Spirit of counsel and strength,
a Spirit of knowledge and of the fear of the Lord.
Then I remembered Proverbs 2:6 says,
6 “For the Lord gives wisdom; from his mouth come knowledge and understanding.”
And then I read in Proverbs 9:10 that -
10 “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and the knowledge of the Holy One is understanding.
So the fear of the Lord, fear of authority, accountability, is the beginning of wisdom, the water, the earth. To have knowledge of the Holy One is understanding, which is heaven. Wisdom is fear of the Lord + Knowledge and both require Strength wouldn’t you say? He’s counseling us from the very first quote teaching us how things come into existence. So the LORD and the seven spirits that rest on him created our beautiful existence!?! It’s so good, it’s so good!
So here’s why I love seeing this being a product of religion: What is the chemical reaction when we climax? The friction is nirvana and everything the Word says is that it will be better when it's a spiritual and emotional connection like waiting until the couple gets married. I don’t think this means you’re disqualified if you’ve had sex already, that would be like saying Yeshua can’t handle the challenge or yourself for that matter. I think his advice points to the appropriate timing, for example, how long did God exist before he finally decided to crush the water? Timing is still everything.
He gave us the ability to wait, the ability to crush, the ability to learn, the ability to grow, the ability to separate our darkness, the ability to transform like metamorphosis, the ability to feel, the ability to procreate, the ability to LOVE. For years, I felt shame in this arena feeling condemned before I even experienced anything close to the act of love. To be honest, I’m still waiting. Yes, I gave up my V-Card to someone less kind, but I believe I’ll still have that tender wedding night moment discovering what gentleness truly is, what love truly is. That's a new thought for me, a new hope
I can’t let people afraid of divorce, sin, and their own transgressions rob me of this joy. If I do then I’ll never get there and that’s the meaning of anticlimactic. Wisdom is fear with knowledge. Those that don’t fully understand our Lord use fear tactics to be able to grasp your lifestyle. This is why I believe he says to Fear the Lord, in awe of the Lord, because he wants you to live out your life with the freedom he’s paid for you. Focus on Him, Love him first so he can teach you to love yourself so when you turn around to Love others it’s with the correct definition.
That’s the POWER of LOVE!
Added Note 4/15/22
I celebrated my one year anniversary of abstinence in February and it’s a choice and I don’t judge those who don’t want to make it. I personally wanted to wait for my future Carrot as a way to show my faith and devotion that I believe he is out there somewhere and doing the same for me. I want to experience a night of new first’s, a night of intimacy, a night of tender kindness, and I now believe with Yeshua that it’s possible even though everything I was told when I was younger contradicted that.
Friends, the Power of His Love trumps our sins. It’s impossible to sin no more. I’ve been a Christian all my life, dedicated, baptized, born again, and human nature still strikes in moments of weakness. It’s like he knew what he was doing by designing his book the way he did as the Author of our existence. I’m done abusing myself for the guilt that our Father never wanted us to bear.
Original Painting painted in July 2021 "Palms"
Today is Good Friday, the day he paid for our freedom to love. Just live and do the best you can while sharing the good news…
YOU ARE LOVED!